No PMO for 8 Years (Almost) – The Truth That Keeps Me Going

In this post, I am going to show you exactly how to go “No PMO.”

Step by step.

This is a strategy that I use to help thousands of followers overcome porn addiction.

I am Coach Roman Mironov, and I help people with their goal of “No PMO.”

And if you want to stop it in your life, you’ll love the actionable strategy in this post.

Keep reading.

Companion video

If you prefer watching to reading, check out the companion video:

When I started my “No PMO” journey, I couldn’t talk about it to anyone.

All my friends watched porn so they would think I was crazy.

But what I realized for myself is that PMO is a free dopamine fix that is anything but free.

That was a huge insight for me.

Let’s unpack it, starting with the first part.

PMO: Free Dopamine Fix

PMO is a free dopamine fix that is anything but free

Porn gave me quick pleasure by raising levels of the neurotransmitter dopamine.

It was like a button that I pressed whenever I felt unhappy or bored.

It was free and easily available. And it immediately gave me short-term pleasure.

But how much did this short-term pleasure cost me to produce?

Let’s look at the second part of this concept.

PMO: Anything but free

PMO is a free dopamine fix that is anything but free

That’s what I felt after watching porn and masturbating:

1. Wasted time and energy
2. Wasted potential
3. Shame because I had to hide
4. Overall unhappiness with life

The more I pushed this Free Dopamine Fix button, the less effect it had.

I was overstimulated.

And I needed ever more stimulation to feel happy.

As soon as I understood this “short-term pleasure vs. long-term cost” dynamic, I knew I had to stay on the “No PMO” path.

And despite strong resistance in me and lack of support, my resolve to heal the brain from porn got stronger.

That’s how I did 7 years of NoFap… with two short relapses.

And that’s exactly how you‘re going to conquer porn addiction.

Now let’s dive right into what I call the “15 Minutes of Sacrifice” technique that will help you do that.

“15 Minutes of Sacrifice” technique: bad scenario

Imagine yourself feeling unhappy or bored or lonely.

And you want to escape this feeling.

So you press the FDF button: you watch porn, masturbate, and feel good in the process.

You escape that bad feeling.

But how long does it last? On average, 15 minutes.

What happens after that?

You feel even worse than when you started.

And you have that bad feeling on average for 2 hours.

So that’s 15 minutes of pleasure vs. 2 hours of pain.

That said, let’s look at an alternative scenario.

Somehow I like it more!

“15 Minutes of Sacrifice” technique: good scenario

Again, you feel unhappy or bored and want to escape.

But this time, you spend the same 15 minutes not doing PMO.

You choose to be strong.

I know that is difficult… and painful.

But afterward, you get 2 hours of pleasure because you feel good about making the right choice.

That’s 15 minutes of pain vs. 2 hours of pleasure.

When you compare these two options, the choice is obvious.

That said, here’s how you can apply the “15 Minutes of Sacrifice” technique to go “No PMO”:

Step 1: Use a timer and get moving

Suppose you feel an urge to watch porn.

Set a timer for 15 minutes.

And then get moving. Get UP! Stretch!

Movement changes your state, helping you to shift focus from the urge to physical activity.

With that, let’s go to Step 2.

Step 2: Program yourself for awareness

Here’s a mantra you repeat to yourself during these 15 minutes:

How I’ll spend these 15 minutes matters.

My mind always looks for threats to ensure my survival.

It sees my unhappiness as a threat and pushes me to escape it with short-term pleasure of PMO.

I appreciate it but is it critical for my survival? Not really.

PMO will just make me feel good for 15 minutes.

But then I will feel even worse for 2 hours.

I am exercising my power to flip it.

Instead, I’ll feel bad for 15 minutes but then I will feel good for 2 hours.

I am a rational person. It makes sense to me. I am making a conscious choice.

By saying this, you literally program yourself for “No PMO.”

That said, here’s step 3.

Step 3: Get yourself motivated

Now think of your deep motivation to flip 15 minutes and 2 hours.

Those 2 hours feel great because you don’t feel pain.

You didn’t succumb to the temptation.

You didn’t let your lower self make the decision for you.

You made the right choice and let your higher self take over.

“There is no real excellence in all this world which can be separated from right living.” ― David Starr Jordan.

You’re living a good life—that’s what gives you real lasting happiness.

You’re being kind to your body and mind—physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

Now moving along to Step 4.

Step 4: Exercise discipline

That’s your defining moment.

We can talk about it all day but in the end… it all comes down to execution.

Reach into your heart and find the strong part of you—the warrior.

He can do it… and will.

That said, here’s our final step.

Step 5: Return to this article repeatedly

Finally, return to this article often. Especially when you have an urge.

It will remind you about the “15 Minutes of Sacrifice” technique and keep you motivated.

Bonus: I keep relapsing on No PMO, why ❔

When I’d finished a PMO session many years ago, I’d always hate myself. And I’d make a promise to myself to quit it for good.

But then I’d relapse anyway. This cycle kept on repeating for years.

I didn’t understand why I kept relapsing back then. But after I read George Lenard’s book Mastery: The Keys to Success and Long-Term Fulfillment, my eyes opened.

What is homeostasis ❔

It turns out that there is a system in our mind that prevents us from changing. It’s called homeostasis.

Homeostasis is an equilibrium state that our mind automatically returns to because this state ensured our survival in the past. It’s like our comfort zone.

A decade ago, I had mild depression and survived it by developing an addiction to social media and porn. I taught my brain that this is my homeostasis.

After I recovered from depression, I wanted to get rid of my addictions. But every time, I kept relapsing because my brain felt uncomfortable about these changes and returned me to homeostasis—the old me riddled with bad habits.

Look, homeostasis is an amazing system that protects us from stress. Among other things, it maintains blood pressure and body temperature.

But the problem with homeostasis is that it only cares about survival in the short term. The system doesn’t want to improve. It only wants to maintain its current state.

It creates a strong gravitational pull to stay in the current comfort zone that is very hard to resist. Imagine a jealous friend who doesn’t want you to make progress in life because they fear you will abandon them.

Of course, the problem with homeostasis is that it holds you back from pursuing your dreams or goals. It’s about survival right now, not about success or fulfillment in the long term. Those things are scary for homeostasis.

Homeostasis is also tightly connected to our habits. When you make some behavior habitual, it becomes part of your homeostasis. That habit comes easy but breaking it is difficult.

How can you use homeostasis to your advantage ❔

After learning about homeostasis, I realized that I could make it work for me rather than against me.

I had to break through it initially with willpower. But then my homeostasis would shift and new habits would become easier.

I did this with my social media and porn addiction. The first two weeks were brutal as I was breaking through resistance of my homeostasis. But then going got much easier.

With time, it became easier to maintain the new homeostasis. That resistance I broke through now became my support. I remembered how I hated my old life with all those addictions. And now I was afraid of going back to it.

What are some practical tools for breaking homeostasis ❔

Since homeostasis is tied to habits, I recommend not dropping an old habit but replacing it with a new one. That’s how you trick your subconscious. It feels that something is up but isn’t intelligent enough to see through the deceit. 🙂

I like programming my mind with affirmations. That helps me rewire my old homeostasis by working on the subconscious—where it resides. I’d repeat something like this to myself every morning and evening: “I love being porn-free.”

Visualization also helps when you are too tired to fight the resistance. Let’s say, you don’t want to go see a doctor. That’s fine but make sure that you at least visualize going to a doctor. This will increase your motivation to do it the next day (or maybe even today).

George Lenard also suggests relying on communities for emotional support. Examples include Alcoholics Anonymous and Sex Addicts Anonymous. Another example is asking for help and support on a business forum as you are starting a new business and feel uncertain.

Do not underestimate the fact that even one change can have a very strong effect, causing huge resistance from homeostasis. That’s why I don’t recommend making several changes at a time. They might feel too overwhelming.

Self-hatred, especially after relapsing, will push you to over-commit. For example, you might commit to hitting the gym twice a week but then get sick. You don’t need to go to the gym in this situation because it will only make things. Be kind to yourself instead of hating.

What’s the plan to quit porn now that I know about homeostasis ❔

To take advantage of homeostasis for quitting porn, you need a 3-component system:

The first component is No PMO Battle Plan. That’s a system that you follow so that you know exactly what to do during a 30-day challenge. No guesswork. I recommend using my free Porn Detox Course to build such a plan.

The second component is accountability. You need to have one or more accountability partners who will push you. When you commit to other people, you will always do more than if you made a promise to yourself only.

The third component is military commitment. You can’t lose to your bad habit. It’s a battle and the bad habit is an enemy that will take you down. Unless you stand up and fight, it will kill your happiness.

FAQs

My mind is against me. How can I hack it?

Here’s a quick brain hack.

Your mind doesn’t like to feel the same emotion for too long.

When you have an urge, your mind gets tired of it soon and wants to move on.

When you wait patiently for those 15 minutes to pass, you take advantage of that.

You help your mind do what it wants to do naturally: shift focus from the urge to something else.

Does PMO hurt my karma?

Karma is real: meaning?

Karma is about selfishness vs selflessness. When you act selfishly, you become more selfish. For example, the more you watch porn, the more egoistically you then act in other areas of your life.

When you love yourself more, you love everything else less. Withholding love for the world results in pain.

That is how karma gets you. That’s why they say karma is real.

But when you do the right thing and act selflessly, you are more loving. And you benefit from good karma.

Good karma means contentment instead of pain. That’s why taking the right action like quitting your addiction to porn and jerking off helps you feel really better.

Speaking of karma—how about thinking about the moral aspect of supporting the adult film industry ❓

How do I support the porn industry by consuming pornographic materials ❓

Weel, that’s actually NoFap motivation 101: stop contributing to the success and growth of the porn industry ❓

The adult industry took advantage of me as a teenager. I didn’t know any better and made an unconscious choice to watch this stuff. That’s not fair that porn is right in the face today, starting with Instagram as “softcore porn.” The industry preys on guys who don’t have the social skills to get a girlfriend.

I am not a religious person, but I believe the moral aspect of religion is helpful for NoFap motivation. Watching porn is a sin in many religions. God strikes you for this sin even though you might not make the connection initially. My “striking” in the form of divorce 8 years ago and porn-induced depression.

Here’s also a great story from a follower, Mr. M:

My burning hatred for the adult film industry and its actors/actresses has helped me not relapse. Whenever the urge kicks in I just tell myself, you’d be giving those scumbags what they want, don’t fall in.

By giving in I’m giving them my time and seed, things I could be giving to a good woman in real life. I read somewhere that porn is free because you pay with your soul, and that is absolutely true. Everything Satan does is an evil and poor copy of what God created, to destroy and corrupt people. God created sex for procreation and the expression of genuine love between a man and a woman, and in response, Satan put promiscuity, unnatural sexual activities, and porn in people’s minds.

Someone watches porn recreationally and feels it’s adding some spice to their sex life ❓I will say that if you need a celebrity without morals to help you spice up your sex life, you’re not creative, you’re lazy.

Mr. M surely gave me a lot of NoFap motivation 👍

What’s one unusual NoFap – PMO perspective?

Let’s see. Oh, this could be the culture perspective. What is PMO culture really?

• Vicarious living culture. Watching other people have sex is probably as good as having it myself.
• Staying numb culture. I need PMO to disconnect from reality.
• Consumer culture. Consume porn instead of creating your own love life

And what about NoFap culture?

• No PMO culture. Doing the right thing for your body and mind. And feeling good about it.
• High productivity culture. I have more time, energy, and mental bandwidth for the things that matter.
• “Realizing your potential” culture. I create a career, business, or art that is a representation of my worth and potential.

What’s a good example of No Fap before and after❓

Let me share an inspiring story of a client.

He is fantastic. A successful entrepreneur. Very creative, especially with music. Very loving.

But he had this PMO addiction that would hold him back so much.

Before No Fap:

He trashed his apartment. He didn’t feel motivated to clean or organize it. Every time he thought about cleaning, it made him feel tired.

He would spend weeks at home, afraid of going out and facing the reality. He wallowed in the comfort of PMO and tried to ignore the painful consequences.

He lost a great intimate relationship to PMO. Because of fapping, he lost confidence and desensitized himself to intimacy. Until he and his girlfriend grew apart.

He had quit a few addictions in his life. PMO was the only one left, holding him back. Until he challenged himself to quit PMO in December 2022. These are the NoFap benefits he has reaped.

After No Fap:

He spent a day cleaning his apartment right before Christmas. It is a great result that motivates him every day.

His results at the gym improved.

He wakes up earlier and well rested. Even before his alarm clock goes off. NoFap nights and mornings feel so much better.

His creativity kicked in. The longer his streak is, the better ideas he has for his company. Also in his music and art.

He noticed more female attraction. Simple signs, but still girls started to smile and stare at him more. One girl actually did a cold approach on him in the

street ❗

The skin on his face feels clean and not oily.

Morning wood is back ❗

His friends and colleagues notice that he is a different person. They say he’s happier, more confident, and calmer. And they wonder what has changed in his life.

On Day 19, he felt super alive. That’s how he wants to feel going forward. No as a PMO addict.

What if you got motivated and created your own “No Fap before and after” transformation ❓

Willpower for No Fap vs PMO

There are two best times for committing to NoFap. That’s when you have the most willpower.

First, your motivation is the highest at the beginning of the year. You have to use it right away. Don’t let it die. Usually, it will already die after a couple of weeks into the new year.

Second, you feel motivated for No Fap after a PMO session. You feel regretful and addicted. In that opening, you have the willpower to do something about it. But that clarity dies very quickly. And you are back in the cycle of PMO.

Now when you feel motivated, the key is to take action immediately. Don’t wait. Commit yourself right away.

One way to commit yourself is to sign up for my NoFap challenge. It helps people quit PMO every month.

I am sure you feel motivated for No Fap right now. So click the link below and commit now. Don’t wait until it’s too late.

The biggest reason to stop PMO

The biggest reason to stop PMO is to reclaim your life from oblivion.

Let’s say you don’t like your life. You feel lonely, bored, or unhappy.

And then you end up finding an addiction that makes you oblivious to that life. But oblivion is not the way to live your life.

Living your life is actually waking up to living your life, facing what’s wrong with it, and then becoming a hero.

By recognizing you are oblivious, you will feel motivated to stop PMO.

How do I fight a strong urge to fap at night ❓

My urge to fap was strong at night. I didn’t know how to fight it. But now that I’ve been porn-free for 8+ years, I know that my poor sleep contributed to porn watching.

I make sure to sleep well now. When I sleep well, I have zero urges.

I couldn’t fall asleep. Waking up and going to bed earlier and at the same time every day helped me fix that problem.

I also used to be on the phone in my bed. I started to put the phone to sleep first.

I am sure good sleep will help you fight your urge to fap. Especially making your bedtime and wake-up time regular.

Heal your brain from pornography in one month