Here’s how to start NoFap.
I’ve had a PMO addiction for 15 years.
And I even lost my marriage in that period.
But finally, I found the willpower to quit this addiction.
Today, I’ll share the best tips that I learned about how to start NoFap.
Check out my story of quitting PMO:
Change your beliefs around PMO
This is where it all starts.
You need to change how you feel about your addiction to masturbation.
To do that, use Tony Robbins’s system from Awaken the Giant Within.
Step 1: Use the pain and pleasure principle
Now you associate a lot of pleasure with this behavior.
And you need to associate pain with it instead.
Here’s how I did it.
Identifying an old belief:
PMO makes me feel great whenever I feel sad or bored.
Coming up with a replacement belief:
Something I have to hide from others can’t be good for me.
Examples of ideas to associate pain:
- I get erectile dysfunction.
- Porn makes sex look too perfect. And then I don’t become aroused by “real life” sex.
“Real life” sex is a little bit messy and doesn’t have the variety or additional stimulation that porn has.
For example, porn models always wear makeup and beautiful lingerie.
Whereas in real life your woman doesn’t have a reason to go to bed with makeup.
She might be also wearing something basic as her lingerie.
Examples of ideas to associate pleasure:
- I’ll have more time and energy for the things that I enjoy.
- I’ll feel better about myself because I won’t need to hide this behavior anymore.
Step 2: Affirm the new beliefs
Affirm these new beliefs to yourself every day.
The best time to do it is when you are in a peak state.
A peak state is simply a moment when you feel great.
For example, one of my peak states is in a sauna.
Before I go into a sauna, I expose myself to cold—going outside in shorts in winter or taking a cold shower.
Then, I go into a sauna immediately.
I feel ecstatic there—this is a peak state.
This is the best time to do affirmations.
Whatever I do in that peak state gets associated with the pleasure that I feel.
If I wanted to associate pleasure with starting NoFap, I would affirm it to myself then.
That’d create a strong neuro-association in my mind.
Step 3: Reinforce the new belief
After you start Nofap, keep feeding positive messages to your mind.
Read about quitting PMO to reinforce your new beliefs.
Replace the PMO habit with another habit
When you give up a bad habit, you can’t just drop it.
You need to replace it with something else.
The new habit doesn’t even have to be perfect.
As long as it helps you quit PMO, it’s good.
Chewing gum example
For example, I used to fight my habit of sleeping in at one point.
One replacement habit I used was chewing gum immediately after waking up.
It wasn’t a great habit but what was important for me is that it helped me stop sleeping in.
YouTube video example
You can also watch your favorite YouTube channel instead of masturbation.
This is especially effective if you make yourself crave those videos.
To do that, watch them as infrequently as possible.
Suppose, you feel an urge to masturbate.
Watch one minute of a video as a replacement for masturbation.
This limited consumption will create a drive for you
And with time, you’ll rewire your brain to crave these videos instead of PMO.
For example, I love soccer podcasts.
So when I wanted to get off PMO, I listened to these podcasts a little bit.
A few months later, I realized I craved those podcasts, not PMO.
The good thing is that this replacement habit was a pleasurable activity.
So I started to associate pleasure with not masturbating.
That reinforced the new habit even more.
That said, don’t replace quitting masturbation with something that causes you pain.
For example, going for a run or taking a cold shower isn’t a good idea necessarily.
Unless you love them, that is.
Break neuro-associations with PMO
Neuro-associations are links in your brain that associate PMO with specific triggers.
One example is devices where you consume porn.
Your brain associates PMO with those devices.
Whenever you get on those devices, you trigger your masturbation pattern.
You start craving PMO unconsciously.
But if you don’t use them, your pattern doesn’t get triggered.
If you can avoid using them altogether after you start NoFap, that’s perfect.
Otherwise, you can also replace them with a different device.
Say, get another phone.
Eventually, those neuro-associations in your brain will become weaker.
And you’ll crave PMO less.
Also, keep looking for other neuro-associations that might trigger PMO.
This could be a particular place in your home or an online community.
Avoid those triggers as much as possible.
Spend more time with other people
Being around other people is a universal “tool” for breaking addictions.
When you’re struggling with a PMO addiction, you keep thinking about it.
But when you’re around other people, it takes your thoughts off PMO:
- You have to hold a conversation with them.
- It also gets you out of your head and into your heart. You see that there’s more to life than just you with your PMO problem. You feel for other people’s problems and want to help them.
- It also helps you build your social life. You’ll find friends and a girlfriend.
Here are a few ideas:
- Spend more time with your family. Take your parents to a restaurant, for example.
- Offer your friends to do something exciting together.
- Find a Meetup group that might be of interest to you.
Get an accountability partner after you start NoFap
Studies show that having an accountability partner makes a difference.
You set a goal and have them check in to monitor your progress.
The likelihood of accomplishing that goal goes up to 95%.
That’s why it’s crucial to have a NoFap accountability partner.
Ideally, this would be a NoFap coach.
In addition to holding you accountable, they’d also give you leadership and motivation.
Otherwise, you can ask a friend or a mentor to be your accountability partner.
Talk to them at least once a week about your progress.
Also, contact them immediately when you feel like relapsing.
They’ll talk you out of it.
In this case, community members will be your accountability partners.
It’s not as effective as a “real-life” partner, though.
Keep a journal
Speaking of journals, it’s also a good idea to keep a private journal.
Journal about how you feel about quitting PMO.
Write about your urges to masturbate and how you avoided them in your journal.
By writing about it, you’ll become more aware of what’s going on in your mind.
And more awareness means more self-control.
Plus, recording your small wins will create momentum to keep you going.
Get coaching to make 2021 the year when you finally feel in control
If you need help starting NoFap, consider my coaching services.
- Do you want music to sound better?
- Feel that the world has colors?
- Notice all the details you didn’t see before?
- Feel the breeze different on your skin?
- Get attracted to a cool girl?
You can do that more easily if you have the right strategy.
Check out my “Free NoFap Tutorial: 5 Proven Tips to Transform Yourself Now.” This is a free video with practical tips that will make NoFap easier.