Finding a life coach who is right for you can help you transform your life.
The question is how you find one.
In this article, I’ll explain two things to look for in a coach to make sure they’re a great match for you.
It’s also available as a podcast episode:
Two aspects of life coaching
See, a life coach does give you answers and solutions to your challenges.
In that sense, they’re a teacher.
But that’s one part of the story.
The other part is having a life coach who is also a mentor.
A guiding light, so to speak.
They have this special energy about them that helps you commit to the goal of changing yourself.
To illustrate, I’d like to tell you about someone very special to me who was that kind of positive influence in my life.
When I was very young, from birth to about 10 years of age, my family didn’t have much money.
We lived in Russia which was a part of the Soviet Union back then.
The country was struggling and most people including my family were poor.
So my grandmother lived with us because it was cheaper that way.
The five of us including her, my parents, my younger brother, and I lived in a 2-bedroom apartment, about 600 sq ft in size.
Although living with her was sometimes difficult, it was a blessing overall.
She wore two hats.
First of all, she was a teacher who introduced me to a lot of basics in life.
And then she was also a mentor who taught me good habits by example.
And I think of her with gratitude as my first and favorite life coach.
The one who inspired me to be a life coach myself!
Speaking of her role as a teacher in my life, these are some of the practical things she taught me.
Practical skill 1: Cleanliness
She explained that staying clean is important so that you feel good about yourself and don’t offend others by smelling bad or looking untidy.
She sold me on the idea of putting on new clothes every day so that people don’t think I hadn’t slept at home last night.
Practical skill 2: Memory
She helped me develop my memory by making me memorize poems and stories.
That was a foundation for the habit that I have now.
I consciously take the time each day to memorize something, usually a sentence in a foreign language that I’m currently learning.
This is good both for my brain health and knowledge.
Practical skill 3: Discipline
She taught me discipline.
For example, one habit she helped me develop was “Early to bed, early to rise.”
I would often walk to my school in the morning when it was still dark, with no light in the windows.
No one was there yet!
Now, let’s look at the second hat my grandmother was wearing.
And that is of a mentor who led by example.
I subconsciously wanted to mirror her good behaviors.
General skill 1: Reading
She was an avid reader.
Just by watching her sit with a book all the time, I was compelled to start reading at a young age, long before beginning school.
Since then, I’ve never stopped!
Two great things came to me as a result of her influence.
First, I attribute a lot of my successes to reading, just having the information that I would otherwise don’t know.
Second, I feel happy when I read a book or listen to an audiobook.
It’s a privilege to feel happy about something that simple.
I guess one reason I feel so is that it connects me to childhood memories.
General skill 2: Work ethic
My grandmother kept working until almost her last day.
And at home, she was always busy with housework, keeping the place extremely clean.
I’m a lot like her in this sense.
I value hard work.
And I don’t like spending time leisurely—I want to be doing something that adds value.
General skill 3: Money
My grandmother was frugal.
As a result, she always had savings even though she didn’t make much money.
Well, no one did in Russia back then.
But she managed to save money both from her small work income and her pension.
In fact, and it’s funny and sad at the same time, she was one of the few people who lost money due to an unhealthy money reform run by the Soviet government.
I am the same way thanks to her.
I like to spend my money wisely and don’t buy things on a spur of the moment.
As a result, I always have money set aside and I have an aversion to credit.
General skill 4: Basics of gratitude
She taught me a respectful attitude toward things.
For example, when I put on my shoes, I had it to do it slowly and carefully.
This way, I didn’t break the back of the shoes.
When I took off my clothes, I had to fold it carefully instead of tossing it away.
Without the impatience and sloppiness that children usually have about such things.
This taught me attention to detail.
And more importantly, it was the first step for practicing gratitude.
When I was careful and thoughtful about small things, I appreciated them more, even though it was just subconscious initially.
But eventually, I started bringing that feeling of gratitude to a more conscious level.
What does it mean for you in terms of finding a life coach?
Speaking of gratitude, I’m extremely grateful to my grandmother.
And I miss her a lot.
She was both a great teacher and a mentor—a positive influence in my life.
And that’s exactly what a good life coach becomes to you.
Think of coaching as a puzzle.
It has many pieces, but two of them are the more important ones.
First piece: find a life coach who has the answers
The first piece is the coach helping you to understand your issues and give you practical solutions to them.
Like my grandmother taught me cleanliness, a coach will teach you to keep your mind clean of any thoughts that aren’t helping you.
Like my grandmother taught me discipline, a coach will help you with the discipline around setting and achieving your goals.
A life coach can also help clients see potential problems before they actually materialize. Watch this sad video for two examples:
Second piece: find a life coach who is a role model
Now, the second piece of the puzzle is the overall influence that a coach has on you.
You feel this special energy coming from a coach:
- The energy of someone who works on themselves because they know that improvement never stops.
- The energy of a person who believes that everyone has the power to make positive changes in their life.
- And it’s also the energy of someone who believes in you in particular.
Finally, it’s often the energy of a person who had the strength to overcome major challenges in their life.
The author of the Lightworkers Lounge podcast Stephanie Powers said:
Being a great life coach requires great life experiences: both joyful and traumatic.
It’s the act of turning the pain into tools to help others that makes a great life coach.
Where to find a life coach?
That’s your question now—and here is one actionable tip.
A life coach in Montreal, Canada, Lynda Hoffman said:
Finding the right life coach can seem like taking a shot in the dark.
Having hired several coaches myself, I know what it’s like to go through the decision-making process.
I believe that you can never really know if it will be a good fit until you sit face-to-face for that first conversation.
So do it.
Go online, find three life coach websites, and book a free session with them.
Just one session.
Feel the energy coming from that coach.
Do they feel to you like a partner and a mentor who leads by example?
If you see the potential value they can add through that energy, go with them.
If not, move on.
But wait, there’s an even easier way to find a life coach!
I’m a life coach in Toronto and can help you resolve life issues—even those that plagued you for years and feel unsolvable.
Contact me today for a free clarity session.
We’ll sit down to discuss your needs.
I’ll hear you out and offer you a plan.
If you don’t like it, that’s fine.
I can help you find a life coach other than me then.
Get in touch using this form.